Here come the butterflies

It’s here.

It is the week of the Belgian Waffle ride.

I’m going to hop in my car on Wednesday and venture to Asheville. Rest up. Eat up. And then ride all day on Saturday in hopes that I can finish this monster of a course.

I’m the most nervous I think I’ve ever been.

I haven’t felt the pre-race jitters in a little while, and honestly, it’s kind of exciting, because that means I’m really going out of my comfort zone. I’m going to attempt something I’ve never done before, something with a high risk of failure, and that feels like growth to me, even if it is uncomfortable. Like, really uncomfortable.

So I’m just sitting with it. Trying to get all the stuff I need ready. Trying to predict outcomes that I can prepare for, and mentally prepare for outcomes I can’t predict.

All I know is that it’s going to be a hell of a day. Even if everything blows up in my face, I will at least get a nice vacation, a fun road trip, and some beautiful views out of the whole ordeal! Not to mention I worked really hard to train for this one. I climbed a lot of hills, I rode a lot of miles, I did a freakin’ lot of intervals, and I worked on a lot of skills on both the cross bike and the mountain bike. I went out and got uncomfortable as fuck.

I also learned so much about how I handle nutrition and what I need on days that are tough. I’ve been through heat, cold, wind, rain, mud, loose gravel, rocks, steep-ass pitches, dust, chunky rocks … you name it, we’ve ridden it this year! I’ve also healed from a few injuries — the nagging hamstring that carried over from the IRONMAN, the quad, the thigh cramps, and then the shoulder, which is now starting to feel better since I prioritized rest and stretching.

I’ve gained a few pounds, which is tough, but I’ve also gained a lot of strength, so I can see that they’re not all for nothing. My hormones are happy, and that’s the most important thing. I don’t want to fall into a trap where I have a bad relationship with food. I want to be strong AF. A year ago I could not knock out 75 (road) miles in 4.30 moving time, and I can’t tell you how good that felt on Saturday. It felt SO good.

So on the dawn of going to where I have never gone before, I just want to take a moment to acknowledge all the work I’ve put in to get to this very moment, the me of today. In all of its beauty and messiness.

For now — this is the moment I get to live in and enjoy. <3

Wish me luck. I’m going to need it. See you soon, Asheville!